I am going to ATTEMPT to give a crude outline of the process
we will be going through over the next year or so. I actually might be missing
a few steps as I am learning as we go. I’m
noticing that sometimes the agencies we are working with only give us our tasks
as we go, as I think it could get overwhelming. However, as I understand it
right now, this is our plan. Note that each of these layers has multiple sub-layers
that would get really tedious to read, so I’ll spare you. But many of you have
asked, so here goes!
- Application
- Home Study (LOTS of
paperwork – lots of seminar/video watching, 4 visits with our social
worker – she writes a big report)
- WAIT for approval
- Apply to U.S. Immigration
- WAIT for approval
- Gather Dossier for China
(LOTS more paperwork)
- Send for translation
- WAIT for approval
- Read a lot of adoption
books
- Log in to CCCWA (Center
for China’s Children Welfare and Adoption)
- Matching process
- WAIT for a match with a child (Called a “referral”)
- Discern if the match they
have offered is a match for our family
- Accept a referral
- Travel to China to pick up
our child
- Stay in China for 10-14
days to complete legal actions
- Return home to complete
and utter chaos
- Post placement visits with Social worker for a few years to report back to China that all is well.
We’ve been told that the adoption process can be a “hurry up
and wait” experience. I’m beginning to
see this as a decent description. Some
weeks it feels like we are working on adoption stuff every day – scanning paperwork
for our records, transferring money so we can pay a bill on time, writing a
letter to China after the kids go to bed about what I do with myself all day
and why I don’t contribute to the family income J And other times, we just wait on others for
their parts in the process. But even
while we’re not ‘busy’ with stuff, it doesn’t mean we’re not preparing. And it doesn’t mean God isn’t preparing
us.
What’s been interesting to see is how our kids have started
‘waiting’.
Whenever Annie sees something little, she deems that we keep
it for ‘the baby’. Lately, she’s been growing out of socks. Recently she
brought me a pair and confidently announced “Deese don’t fit, but we can keep dem fo da
baby”. Timmy likes to keep track of the
details, so he kindly informs her that it probably won’t be ‘a baby’, but a toddler. In his mind, he’s probably trying to envision
most accurately who this new sibling will really be.
We’ve seen a journey in Jude in the past few weeks that is
also pretty noteworthy. Jude used to ‘hate’
all things multi-cultural. (If anyone
knows our sweet Jude, he wears his emotions on his sleeve and experiences life
with exuberance. He doesn't really hate anything or anyone.)
So, I’ll sometimes play a Chinese Lullabies CD in the van and almost every time he’ll
say with passionate frustration “Is this that Chinese music?” or I’ll sneak some Spanish songs in at
home in the background and he’ll notice and comment “Is this Spanish? I ‘hate’ Spanish.”
Once he added “I don’t understand any of it. It wastes my time.” When he said
that last one, I had to chuckle a little bit. But, I don’t think he hates
Chinese or Spanish, like he thinks. I
think he likes what he knows. Don’t we all?
It takes sacrifice and stepping out of our zone of comfort to learn something “other”
for the sake of understanding people or appreciating more of God’s world. So, last
week we were at a friend’s house for a Valentine’s party. They were painting and as I looked over at
his paper, he had written some Chinese characters he knew with his
paintbrush. He went to a Chinese camp
last summer (which he ‘hated’) and we had recently checked out some books at
the library with more characters in them.
He actually didn’t mind reading those.
I’m seeing the Chinese culture is becoming less “other” to him. Kevin and the kids were watching the opening ceremony for the Olympics the other week. I was in the kitchen, but from downstairs, I could hear three little voices chanting “CHI-NA! CHI-NA!” Apparently, Timothy was leading the others in a celebration when the Chinese Olympians entered the arena. The only other country they cheered for that exuberantly was the USA.
China, like every country, is full of people who make good choices and poor choices. But from here on out, our family will be connected to China in a deep and significant way. It is fun to see how God is preparing our children to be connected as well, even while we wait. God has historically done very incredible things during waiting periods. Preparing Moses’ heart for leadership of God’s people out of Egypt as he worked in the back hills with his flock for almost 40 years, using Joseph’s time falsely accused in prison for 13 years to cultivate humility and grace when he rose to power, growing Abraham and Sarah’s hearts into deep and abiding faith while they waited 25 years for their promised child to be born. While our stories may or may not be as dramatic, we are trusting He will continue to do great works in the hearts of our family as well, as we begin to wait.
